i get all deep thinky. which i usually do not mind as deep thinky thoughts are some of the best kinds of thoughts that there are, but i do not have the time for them lately. i barely have time to think stupid, shallow thoughts, let alone the big thinky ones that are insistent and persistent and will not leave me the eff alone.

i do not want to unload, even here, but i feel like my mind being bogged down by the fog of deep thinky thoughts is bringing down the people all around me. i know that jon could sense it. i know that i can sense it. i know that…i know that there are things to say and that i just do not want to say them. i have to get through thinking them first.

fourth of july was standard, except for the fact that there was sun instead of rain, and that’s the first time that’s happened in the past three or four years. at the fourth of july party @ the philips’ house, jon was completely able to bring up the fourth of july party from three years ago, which is one that i would rather forget for about ten different reasons. and he brought it up in front of jess so the whole time that we talked about it, which was about four point five minutes, we talked all cryptic and around the bush-y. he tried to make up for putting his foot in his mouth by saying things like, “yeah, i remember i pointed you out to weiner and said, ‘i want to do her’ and ‘things have changed so much since three years ago and the best thing is that you’re mine now’ and admittedly, the second attempt was way better than the first, but he should really know by now that three years ago…there are things that i would just rather forget.

a good time was had at the party though. fireworks display run by doug was fantastic as always and, as always, we were amazed by the things that the guy can do with old grill parts and non dairy creamer. the non dairy creamer thing is the scariest part, because, and you should take my word for it, you do not want that shit spilling on your gas lit stove….there WILL be fire.

it was nice to see the people that i really only get to see once a year, and dave and his son chris stopped by too. they only hung around for about half an hour. i told jon that he should really give dave a call sometime soon and we’ll all hang out.

im so confused about so many different things. i feel like my head is too full, and i feel like this was not distraction enough, or cathartic enough for me to waste any more time doing.

peace out cub scout.

~ by warwick on July 6, 2009.